Marriage is one of the most significant decisions in your life. It shouldn’t be taken based on love, age pressure or society. You must go through every aspect and think well when making the decision. I have listed some questions to ask before marriage which are essential.
As the old saying goes-“It’s better to be safe than sorry.”
Marriage is either arranged or love, but this decision has to be taken only on the understanding of what it takes to have a happy and fruitful marriage.
In India, people have this vast concept of adjusting and being selfless, and what society says matter a lot. But see my point is that if you consider these questions to ask before marriage, your 80% of future problems get resolved.
Are all the decisions will be me or we?
Now see after marriage, you become family of someone else. So you should know that your decision will affect everyone. So it is essential to discuss before the wedding that all the decisions will be mutual and it will represent as the decision by the couple.
Which religion to follow?
See, even if you are from the same religion, people may have different idols they worship. So it’s better to clarify that who is your idol and is there an importance to worship other gods if required after marriage.
How you both will manage the household chores, will you divide the work or you will hire a maid. You need to discuss this as in the long run; it’s essential to understand that it is not only one gender responsibility; everything should be mutual. It is one of the most important questions to ask before marriage.
What will be the income source of your family? Will only one gender work and is earning enough to support a family, or both will work, or one can go on pause, and the other one can work if required.
You both have to discuss together to know what are your thoughts on having a child. Will you adopt or give birth? At what age will you both be ready for it and also have proper savings before having a child. All these things are necessary to discuss, and as I said, your decision should be mutual.
Thoughts on big situations
You should also discuss some big unfortunate circumstances that may happen in your future, how you will manage finance, will you take a loan or will you consider other family members to help? How much you are both comfortable in having loan/outside finance help.
What is the location of your home, will you live on rent or will you buy and who is going to live with you in future? Discuss the furniture and decor beforehand only. It seems a trivial question to ask before marriage but believes me, a home is an essential part of your life and should get discussed.
People expect something already from someone just because everyone else does that thing in their marriages. Please don’t do that and if you have any expectations from them, do tell them before the wedding.
If societal pressure is wrong, similarily being mad in love and getting married is also incorrect. A successful marriage relies on reality and being honest to your partners for everything.
Also, one thing is that a failed marriage doesn’t mean a divorce only; it also the same if your relationship has finished, but you are still married in the eyes of society just for namesake.
(DISCLAIMER: I have written this article gender-biased)